Listen up


In preperation for Rosh Hashana, Breslovers always review a certain lesson in the month of Elul. Torah Vav, as it’s called, discusses Rebbe Nachman’s approach to Teshuva, returning to Hashem.

The Rebbe makes the following statement:

וְעִקַּר הַתְּשׁוּבָה – כְּשֶׁיִּשְׁמַע בִּזְיוֹנוֹ, יִדֹּם וְיִשְׁתֹּק

“The essence of Teshuva is to hear oneself being insulted and remain silent”

Simply understood, as has been said in this forum many times, returning to Hashem means aligning your will with His will. In order to align our will with His, we need to be the party that concedes. After all, His will is perfect and righteous. It’s only our will, controlled by our ego, that’s messing up the alignment and stuffing up the pipes of blessing that should flow down on us. This act of teshuva takes quite a measure of humility.  Typically when someone is insulted by another, his ego becomes unleashed. The Rebbe says that the blood in his heart boils from an insult. We need to turn the דם (the blood of the heart) into דום (silence), by shutting our mouths when someone lays it on us real thick. Although it’s a simple act, it’s quite difficult to do. Overcoming the ego’s blood-boil, can have majorly positive results on our character and also make big noise in Heaven.

When my wife, Yocheved, was learning this lesson, she questioned it’s relevancy to those that are oppressed. Wouldn’t such an avodah, of letting oneself be humiliated, be unhealthy for them? How can it be beneficial for someone who is abused, or even someone who feels abused, to allow himself to be ashamed?

One can easily answer that the Rebbe is only addressing someone who is emotionally stable and not a person who is suffering from legitimate abuse. Although this might be the case with another tzaddik, it’s hard for me to believe that the super tzaddik (צדיק האמת) that Rebbe Nachman was wouldn’t address even the most unfortunate of us. I mean, that was what he was/is all about!

Yocheved had a great answer and a novel interpretation of this idea. The Rebbe doesn’t say that the essence of teshuva is when you hear another insult you and remain silent. He says real teshuva is when you hear your own humiliation and remain silent. It’s not as easy as we think to be truly honest with ourselves. Although we seem more ashamed before others than when we are in our own private space, we still hide from ourselves in the most humiliating situations.


It’s hard to truly hear our own criticism. Even this generation, with all its openness and vulnerability, suffers from terribly low self-esteem. That’s because we’re afraid to be real about our most serious shortcomings. We’re ashamed to even admit these things to ourselves. But how can one align himself with something else, if he’s unaware of his true self?  And all the more difficult it must be to align with the source of all truth if we aren’t truthful to ourselves.

We need to open our minds and ears to our souls’ calling. We need to let go of our illusion of control and admit to ourselves who we really are. That’s the essence of teshuva, it’s coming back to the real you. Hashem already knows it anyways. It’s only us that’s still in the dark.

Keep going

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~ The following is based on a lesson from Rabbi Leibish Hundert.

The Mishna Brura writes, (O”C 125:5): “It says in the Sefer Heichalos (an early Kabbalistic work), ‘[Hashem says to the Heavenly angels], You should be blessed if you go and tell my children what I do when they sanctify My name and say קָדוֹשׁ קָדוֹשׁ קָדוֹשׁ. Go teach them that [when saying it] they should raise their eyes up to the skies and lift up their bodies to Me. Because no pleasure I have in this world compares to the moment that their eyes look into my eyes, and my eyes in theirs. At that moment I grab the image of [their grandfather] Jacob on the Holy Throne, and I hug it and kiss it. Then I remember their merits and hasten their redemption“.

What is קָדוֹשׁ קָדוֹשׁ קָדוֹשׁ? Kadosh means separate, or utterly unique. The commentators say that the idea of repeating it three times symbolizes its eternal continuum. So what we’re saying is that Hashem is totally without equal. But more, is that the recognition that He is beyond our comprehension is considered looking into Hashems’ eyes.

The difference between seeing and hearing is that when you see something you see all of it, but when you hear something it’s sequential. You need to keep on hearing and hearing to capture something. There is one exception. Looking into another’s eyes. When you look into someone’s eyes, it’s forever…

When the Mishna (Shabbos 73b) counts the 39 primary prohibitions of labor on shabbos, it lists planting and then plowing. The Talmud asks, doesn’t one plow before he plants? It answers that the author of the Mishna lived in the Land of Israel. In Israel, since the earth is hard and rock-like, one had to plow, plant and then plow again to cover the seeds. In Israel one has to do a second act of covering the seeds. What this means, allegorically, is that covering up is a profound sense of letting go. You thought you plowed and seeded and you’re done, but then Israel requires you to do it again.  It’s hard in Israel. Israel makes you do things again and again (not just going to the משרד הפנים) and that builds the relationship. קָדוֹשׁ קָדוֹשׁ קָדוֹשׁ – again and again, looking into His eternal eyes!

You know, if you look at the blessings that Isaac gave Jacob and Esau, they both got the same blessing! They both were blessed with rain and dew. The difference is that in Esau’s blessing, he gets it once and he’s set, but Jacob gets his flow and then he has to ask again to get it (Rashi says on the vav of וְיִתֶּן לְךָ, that יתן ויחזור ויתן. That’s the blessing, not the rain and dew, but the relationship. To keep and asking and getting, asking and getting, again and again.

This could be what Rebbe Nachman means in Torah 6 that we need to do Teshuva al Hateshuva, we need to constantly be in a state of longing. The tzaddik never stops searching for Hashem, אַיֵּה מְקוֹם כְּבוֹדוֹ again and again. The more he knows the more he understands that he knows nothing. Hisbodedus every day! Never giving up. Hashem isn’t as interested in one good prayer as he is a series of prayers. Again and again!

!קַוֵּה אֶל יְהוָה חֲזַק וְיַאֲמֵץ לִבֶּךָ וְקַוֵּה אֶל יְהוָה



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“Sometimes someone falls into a rut. And this time the rut is really really low, God forbid…And he starts having doubts and negative thoughts. Some of his thoughts even seem bizarre and dizzying. He’s constantly confused. Very confused (בִלְבּוּלִים רַבִּים)! Even though in this dark place it seems absolutely impossible to find Hashem, he still has some hope if he seeks out and looks for Hashem from that place. [How does he do that? How can he find Hashem in such a slump. By] asking ‘אַיֵּה מְקוֹם כְּבוֹדוֹ’, ‘Where are You Hashem’? The farther he feels from Hashem, the more he should express his pain and search for Hashem even more. [‘Where are You now Hashem? Look how far I’ve fallen now, can You possibly be here with me?’]. Through this method of longing and yearning for Hashem, recognizing how far one is from Him, one can actually rise out of this pit with a perfect ascent, because the aspect of אַיֵּה is exceedingly Holy and powerful”. (Meshivas Nefesh 30)

Rebbe Nachman urged his followers to live with this teaching; To constantly review it and to always ask אַיֵּה. In fact, even the greatest tzaddikim never stop asking אַיֵּה. The more they learn and ascend, the more they feel, in a sense, humbled and distant from Hashem. They ask אַיֵּה again and again. ‘Where are You now? I thought I knew where You were but now I realize that I didn’t know anything at all’.

I want to point out something very obvious from this teaching. The Rebbe talks about בִלְבּוּלִים, the uneasy feeling of confusion. It’s not uncommon these days to feel this feeling very strongly. Life moves really fast nowadays and there are so many expectations that we have from ourselves and that others have from us. We can literally walk around feeling drained from an overload of disorder and perplexity.

In Psalms 86, King David says  יַחֵד לְבָבִי לְיִרְאָה שְׁמֶךָ,  ‘Align my heart to be in awe of You’. The heart is the place of our thoughts (Torah 49). This is a cry to Hashem to straighten us out. Sometimes we just want to get to zero! Just put me back together. “Align us”, Hashem. There are so many בִלְבּוּלִים nowadays. We can’t do it without You. Unbend us, help us breathe; Help us think straight at least. יַחֵד לְבָבִי – Turn my many hearts into one heart, your heart!


Uman 2016 Revisited


With Rosh Hashana around the corner, of course, I’ve been thinking a lot about the annual kibbutz to Uman. I was recently reminiscing of my first trip to the Rebbe in 2016. I remember feeling blown away by the aura of unity and joy; It was unearthly. The experience touched me so deeply that my desire to prolong the feeling led me to learn what it’s all about. Thank God, when I returned to Israel, I still felt the longing and I started the never-ending journey of learning Rebbe Nachman‘s lessons straight from the source.

In retrospect, I’m very pleased that my interest in Uman led me to delve into the Rebbe’s books. I could have easily chosen a more cosmetic path, which I’m not certain would have had the same profound effect on me.

But I had another thought recently too. Maybe I’m wrong, (and if so I apologize), but I’d bet that at least half of the chevra the yearly pilgrimage to Uman on Rosh Hashana aren’t well-versed in the books of Breslov. So why did I think that by learning Rebbe Nachman’s teachings, I would uncover the mystery of Uman Rosh Hashana? Maybe the special feeling wasn’t sourced in his holy lessons, but rather in something else?

My friends, I tell you plainly, nearly three years after that first trip, that the amazingness of the Uman experience is solely a product of the most magnificent and awe-inspiring Torah lessons taught by Rebbe Nachman, and his admiring pupil Reb Nosson. The only thing that matches the glory of Uman is the brilliance of Toras Breslov. It’s nothing short of bewildering how his lessons can speak to the most simple unlearned people and simultaneously uncover for the greatest scholars the deepest secrets of Kabbalah. This was Rebbe Nachman of Breslov. A unique lover of all Jews – every single one – no matter where that person was holding, and an extraordinary desire to relate to that Jew and inspire him to desire a relationship with God in his every day life.

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The smiling skies

smiling sky

“You should know, [Hashem’s] presence fills the entire earth and there is no place that is empty of Him…Even if someone does business [far away from his home] with people of different cultures, he can’t excuse himself and say ‘I can’t serve Hashem here, because it’s too dark and mundane here’. In every physical thing and in all the languages of the world one can find Godliness.  Because without His Godliness, there is no ability at all to exist. It’s just that the lower the place is, the more hidden and covered up is its Godliness”. (Torah 33)

צָרִיךְ לָדַעַת, שֶׁמְּלֹא כָל הָאָרֶץ כְּבוֹדוֹ וְלֵית אֲתַר פָּנוּי מִנֵּהּ … וַאֲפִלּוּ מִי שֶׁעוֹסֵק בְּמַשָּׂא וּמַתָּן בַּגּוֹיִים לֹא יוּכַל לְהִתְנַצֵּל וְלוֹמַר אִי אֶפְשִׁי לַעֲבֹד אֶת הַשֵּׁם יִתְבָּרַךְ מֵחֲמַת עוֹבִיּוּת וְגַשְׁמִיּוּת שֶׁנּוֹפֵל תָּמִיד עָלָיו מֵחֲמַת הָעֵסֶק שֶׁעוֹסֵק תָּמִיד עִמָּהֶם, כִּי בְּכָל הַדְּבָרִים גַּשְׁמִיִּים וּבְכָל לְשׁוֹנוֹת הַגּוֹיִים יָכוֹל לִמְצֹא בָהֶם אֱלֹקוּתוֹ, כִּי בְּלֹא אֱלֹקוּתוֹ אֵין לָהֶם שׁוּם חִיּוּת וְקִיּוּם כְּלָל רַק כָּל מַה שֶּׁהַמַּדְרֵגָה יוֹתֵר תַּחְתּוֹנָה אֲזַי אֱלֹקוּתוֹ שָׁם בְּצִמְצוּם גָּדוֹל וּמְלֻבָּשׁ בְּמַלְבּוּשִׁים יוֹתֵר

So Hashem’s presence fills the entire world, right? But how does that help when we’re stuck in a these low places? How can we recognize His presence when we feel like hell and are having such a hard time coping?

There are 12 permutations of the Tetragrammaton (the name of Hashem יהו-ה). The simplest, and yet most essential permutation is of course יהו-ה. The Arizal writes that this permutation is an acronym for the verse “יִשְׂמְחוּ הַשָּׁמַיִם וְתָגֵל הָאָרֶץ” (Psalms, 96:11). “The Heavens will rejoice and the earth will be glad”.

I think, on the most basic level, the idea behind this is that the name of God, in its  simplest form, is represented by rejoicing and joy. A name is not a simple thing. The Maharal teaches that one’s name is his essence. שֵׁם (name) is the same letters as שָׂם (there). Meaning, you are where your name is. Whatever your name is, that defines where/who you are. This verse is indicating, that when we refer to Hashem’s name in the most straightforward way, we are referring to a state of gladness and rejoicing.

So maybe this is what Rebbe Nachman means? Hashem’s presence is everywhere, even in the lowest places. But how does one tap-in to this Godliness in a low place? By finding joy! When we can let go of our suffocating feelings and find something to be glad about – even in what seems to be the hardest situation – we can find Godliness absolutely anywhere. Of course, the lower the space, the harder it is to find Godliness (aka joy), but that’s just because it’s hidden. It’s truly there. The skies are always smiling.

Back to the basics

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There is a popular Breslov book called השתפכות הנפש. It’s a collection of teachings from the writings of Rebbe Nachman and Reb Nosson on the topic of prayer, authored by Alter Tepliker, a fourth generation Breslover chassid.

The book starts off with a rather lengthy introduction in which he demonstrates how prayer, specifically hisbodedus (the practice of setting aside time for improvisational personal prayer in our mother tongue) was a foundational practice used by all of our forefathers and ancestry throughout Jewish history.

I found it interesting that, after the introduction, the author starts off the body of the book with the following piece from Tinyana 73:

“Whoever wants to be worthy of תשובה (coming back to Hashem), should recite Psalms frequently, because reciting Psalms is מסוגל (propitious) for returning to Hashem”. 

In that piece Rebbe Nachman teaches how King David prophetically embedded Psalms  to the 49 gates of תשובה, so that all the 12 tribes, whose names total 49 letters, can enter the proper gate to return to Hashem.

But why start with this lesson? If I wanted to teach about hisbodedus, surely I would find a better lesson to begin with and inspire my readers. Namely, the second lesson he quotes, “Hisbodedus is a great virtue and higher than everything”! Why begin with a lesson about the importance of reciting Psalms?

I think there is a very profound, and layered message that the author might be hinting at by using this lesson as a starting point. Many people think that hisbodedus and personal prayer is some immensely inspiring practice. When we go out to the woods or enter another place of seclusion and talk to Hashem we want it to be esoteric and life changing. We’re always seeking inspiration to sweep us off our feet and give us wings to fly. But it doesn’t always happen. Anyone who practices personal prayer consistently will tell you that it doesn’t always flow and you don’t feel significantly different after every session.

To too many people, reciting Psalms is a chore. “I can’t connect”, “I don’t understand what I’m saying”, or “What does saying these old texts really do for me?” I very much relate to Psalms and I think the main reason why most people don’t relate to them is because there’s this bizarre pressure to recite many of them. It’s like we don’t feel that we’ve accomplished anything if we didn’t finish our quota, or a significant amount. We need to reframe and put our utmost attention into the few lines we say. Every word is stuffed with holiness, like an overpacked suitcase. If we don’t understand the words, there are available translations in every language possible. Stop trying to finish Psalms and allow yourself to relate in the most simple way to the deepest and simplest words of prayer ever written. Maybe it’s not the most glorious thing to do, maybe it’s hard to focus on but we must slow it down significantly and get real with it. Tehillim is infused with opportunities for תשובה. King David, in his unfathomable greatness, had every one of us in mind when he drew these words down from Heaven, and his ultimate purpose was to draw us back to Heaven.

Try it again…Slow down…Wake yourself up and come back to Him. He’s waiting for you to call…


The only way back home


Torah 52 is one of the most fundamental lessons in Likutei Moharan about hisbodedus. (Hisbodedus is the practice of setting aside time for improvisational personal prayer in our mother tongue). Rebbe Nachman starts the lesson by dispelling the heretical belief that God was compelled to create the universe. In other words, some believe He had no choice but to create the world. The Rebbe argues that only God Himself is an essential reality, and it was/is His choice whether or not to create and, for that matter, to sustain the world.

Asks the Rebbe, what causes these atheists to make this mistake? Because after Hashem decided to create and bring down the Jewish souls into this world, He is, in a certain sense, forced to continue creating and maintaining the universe for them. But surely it was His choice to create their souls or not. Just after He decided to go ahead with it, he is compelled to preserve the world on their behalf.

Next, the Rebbe teaches the reason why Hashem created the world for these Jewish souls. Very simply, so that they do His will and thereby return to their essence, which is an aspect of Himself, which, again, is the only essential reality. So when we do His will, we unite with Him and also become essential to existence.

But how do we return to our essence, to our root, and align ourselves with Hashem? Says Rebbe Nachman, there is only one way to become one with Hashem in such a real way – By being מבטל ourselves. ביטול literally means to nullify oneself, but I like to think of it as making ourselves transparent. We naturally have desires and habits that are opposed to Hashem’s will. Those negative actions, feelings and thoughts stand in the way of our unity with Him. When we clear out those barriers, then we mirror Hashem’s desires and we align ourselves with His will in the deepest way. The only way to do this, says the Rebbe – the only way to remove all the obstructions that prevent our return to Him – is through hisbodedus.

Rebbe Nachman explains what type of hisbodedus he refers to:

 עַל יְדֵי שֶׁמִּתְבּוֹדֵד, וּמְפָרֵשׁ שִׂיחָתוֹ בֵּינוֹ לְבֵין קוֹנוֹ, עַל יְדֵי זֶה הוּא זוֹכֶה לְבַטֵּל כָּל הַתַּאֲווֹת וְהַמִּדּוֹת רָעוֹת עַד שֶׁזּוֹכֶה לְבַטֵּל כָּל גַּשְׁמִיּוּתוֹ, וּלְהִכָּלֵל בְּשָׁרְשׁוֹ

Hisbodedus can be many things for many people but one key element of this practice is to use the time to systematically align ourselves with the will of Hashem, by praying to Hashem for help in suppressing our negative habits which interfere with our ability to line-up our will with His will. Rebbe Nachman suggests working on one negative attribute at a time, and praying endlessly for help to overcome our limitations. Anyone familiar with the legends told of the Rebbe will know that this practice of praying for help was his essential tool to greatness. In his biographies, Reb Nosson writes how the Rebbe struggled in learning. First in Chumash, then in Mishna, then in Gemara etc. but each time he struggled he wouldn’t cease beseeching Hashem for help to understand and progress. No matter how many times he failed to understand or succeed, he kept on coming back and asking again and again in different ways. Sometimes he felt so rejected that it took a few days for him to pick himself up and start asking again, but he never gave up. He always continued begging for closeness. This is why he said, “anyone can be as great as me”. Because it doesn’t take pedigree or intellectual brilliance to rise to greatness, all it takes is an iron will and an unrelenting desire to be one with God.

In studying this lesson I was bothered by the following question: What prompted Rebbe Nachman to talk about the argument of whether the world is an essential reality in the same lesson where he teaches about hisbodedus through working on aligning ourselves with the will of Hashem?

I think there is a subtle but critical point he’s making by the juxtaposition. It is here in this lesson that the Rebbe is teaching the reason for creation (כְּדֵי שֶׁיַּעֲשׂוּ רְצוֹנוֹ) and the path (הִתְבּוֹדְדוּת) to reach our fullest potential (לְהִכָּלֵל בְּשָׁרְשׁוֹ). He bluntly says that it’s not possible to reach our best in any other way. (In other places he said that he spoke with other great tzaddikim who all agree that every tzaddik who ever lived only reached their exalted levels through this one practice). This is not a good idea for success. This is the only possibility for success in serving Hashem. What’s more is that it’s a certainty for success. If a Jew commits himself to this one practice with as much energy and devotion as he can, he is sure to be successful and have his prayers answered; guaranteed. Why do I say that? Because this is why the Rebbe juxtaposed the two ideas. By consistently practicing hisbodedus with the intent of removing all the obstructions between us and our Creator, we get closer and closer to unifying with Him in the most awesome way. This growth makes us more and more an essential reality, just like Him, and in that hallowed space our will is one with His will. When we want something, we will have it because He wills it too. We become connected at the root to Him and where one goes, the other goes. This is why hisbodedus of ביטול is the most crucial aspect of service and the only path to succeed, because it takes us out of the realm of possibility to the world of certainty.

יְהִי רָצוֹן מִלְּפָנֶיךָ יְהוָה אֱלהֵינוּ וֵאלהֵי אֲבוֹתֵינוּ, שֶׁתְּרַחֵם עָלַי וְתִהְיֶה בְעֶזְרִי וּתְזַכֵּנִי לְהַרְבּוֹת בְּהִתְבּוֹדְדוּת תָּמִיד עַד שֶׁאֶזְכֶּה עַל יְדֵי הַהִתְבּוֹדְדוּת לְבַטֵּל עַצְמִי לְגַמְרֵי, עַד שֶׁיִּתְבַּטֵל יֵשׁוּתִי לְגַמְרֵי וְאֶהְיֶה נִכְלָל בְּאַחְדוּתְךָ בֶּאֱמֶת

Always more


Korach had completely neutralized his bodily desires. As one of the Levites that carried the holy ark, he was on such a spiritual level that he had absolutely no appetite for lusts and animalistic passion. This led him to believe, says Reb Nosson (Hilchos Shiluach Hakan 4), that he was perfect. He couldn’t understand why he needed to subjugate himself to leaders if he had attained such spiritual heights.

What he failed to recognize is that there are infinite levels of growth and connection to the Divine. It’s not game over when one has fixed his body alone. There are levels upon levels of sweetening the judgements that exist for those special individuals who soar at spiritual heights. Korach needed Moses to teach him and lead him higher, but his ego stopped his ascent.

How in the world is this relevant to us, who are nowhere near perfect? We, who struggle, every moment with bodily lusts and cravings – What can we learn from Korach’s mistake?

The truth is we make the same mistake all the time, because we think that on our low level, we can never rise up and reach new heights. By giving up on ourselves, we are essentially believing that Teshuva is not available for someone as bad as we are. The opposite is really true. The farther we are from Hashem, the greater glory He gets from our Teshuva. We too must believe that no matter how many times we tried, we can still be successful and reach places we’ve never been.

This is the job of the tzaddik. He encourages the sinners that there is still hope and they can certainly come back to Hashem, and he challenges the great ones to keep striving because they haven’t seen nothin’ yet. The tzaddik believes this with all his heart. He believes that the lowly Jews are the most precious jewels that fell in the dirt. And he believes that even on his awesome level, he essentially knows nothing.

When Rabbi Shlomo Freifeld was on his deathbed, his last words to his children were מער, בעסער, גרעסער – more, better, bigger. Greatness is always available. Always available.


This is how it is, or is it?


Although the intellect of a child is typically much weaker than that of an adult, the opposite is true when it comes to his imagination. We’ve all seen how powerful a child’s imagination can be. They literally believe their thoughts to be an alternate reality.

In Tinyana 8, Rebbe Nachman says that the key ingredient to true faith is a clear imagination. The intellect is limited by its knowledge. Faith only starts where the intellect can no longer go. By means of a pure imagination we can soar to heights of faith and come close to our Creator.

So often in our life we’re faced with trying situations where we feel stuck. We don’t believe that we can ever break out of the cycle that we find ourselves in. Whether it’s a financial hole, a substance addiction or a bad job, we rack our brains exploring all the options to free ourselves, but we’re left with that dejected feeling of “the same old me”. I think this despondence comes from the opposite of imagination; cynicism. When we see a child lost is his imagination, it’s comical to us. We think it’s ridiculous that the child can believe in something that we can’t understand. We’re too limited by our intellect. Our ego doesn’t allow us to entertain something we don’t know exists. But the sweet child is in touch with a force that catapults him to another world. He imagines. He believes.

The Rebbe goes on to say that the role of the true tzaddik is to refine our imagination. With his ruach hakodesh (Divine Spirit), he teaches us about faith and cultivates our imaginative faculty.

Says Reb Nosson (Hilchos K’vod Rabo 3:6), this is what’s so bitter about the destruction of our Holy Temple. When the temple stood, there was a great spirit of prophecy. The tzaddikim drew down that Divine spirit and blew into our souls words of optimism that refined our imagination and enhanced our faith.

How sad that with so few true tzaddikim left, we feel stuck in a one dimensional world of repetition. Our only hope is to soak up their holy words and open our minds to another reality – The space of imagination, the world of faith.


Living in the now


Life can be a rollercoaster. They say that when it rains, it pours. I notice that when the obstacles and challenges pile up, my thoughts trip me up. I feel like I wanna give up and I linger in the negativity for too long.

There is an interesting Mishna in Avos (5:11) which talks about the four types of temperaments that people have. Some people are easily angered, while others are slow to anger. Some are easily appeased after they get angry and others are very hard to appease.

I feel like when we vacillate in the negative thoughts, we’re acting like that guy in a bad mood who is just impossible to appease. It’s almost like the stubborn angry guy wants to simmer in his anger because he believes that he deserves to be angry for a long time, based on what happened to him. If he allows himself to feel better, then the bad cards he was dealt will be under-appreciated. But why would we want to feel bad for longer? Wouldn’t we feel better if we got over it? It’s obviously a trap that our mind (aka the other side) plays on us. It attempts to convince us that we’ll feel better if we brew in our anger, and the ego is easily fooled by this trick.

In Shivchei Haran, a small book written by Reb Nosson about the greatness of Rebbe Nachman, it talks about the Rebbe’s struggles in serving Hashem.

“He would start every day fresh. Meaning, sometimes when he fell from his [earlier] levels, he wouldn’t give up. He just said, ‘I’ll start now as if I never served Hashem before in my life. I’m just starting now to serve Him for the first time’. So it was every time. He always started over. He was accustomed to starting anew many times a day! (אות ו)

This level absolutely amazes me. That is so difficult to do! It takes such mental toughness to just start again, like you never started before and for the first time.

I always admired the professional athletes who can access this short term memory. When a pitcher takes the mound and gives up two home runs in a row to the first two batters, but then settles down and pitches lights out for the rest of the game, that is impressive. Or when a player is in a must-win game and has a poor first half, but then comes out in the second half and dominates, it shows that he was able to just hit the refresh button. It’s worth practicing. So much of why we get down and stay down is because we give too much credence to our thinking. We can easily be more like Rebbe Nachman and let go of trying to fix the past. We gotta focus on the now and let the good positive feelings that naturally flow from Hashem penetrate and fill our minds, so we can move forward happily again.

Please Hashem help us let go of our negative thoughts. Please fill our minds with positivity and quiet our egos, so we can feel Your presence and not linger in our misery. Amen!